Traffic

I deal with a lot of traffic issues as part of my job. On Tuesdays I do traffic court, and I am constantly swamped the rest of the time with DUIs. So I know a thing or two about traffic in American Samoa.

The first thing to know is that there is really only one road. Many times people will refer to something like the Tafuna Public Highway. The key emphasis is on the word ‘the’. As in, it is the one and only highway going through the village of Tafuna. It’s also the only street going through Fagasa, Nu’uuli, Pago Pago, Fatu ma Futi, Fagatogo, and every other village on the outskirts of the island. Depending on what village you are in, that is the public highway you are on. The highway goes around the entire island.

In fairness, there are roads that branch off the main road. Airport Road is one example. Airport Road is called such because it goes to the airport. It is also called McDonald’s road, because there is a McDonald’s on it. There is also a Pizza Hut and KFC on the same road, but nobody refers to the road as such because that would be ridiculous.

The point being, there aren’t many roads, and none of them are officially named. In fact, to describe where something is, and this includes in legal documents, you must say the village it’s in, and a particularly memorable landmark. Many DUI trials include language such as, “The defendant was stopped at the Tafuna Public Highway, near the KS Mart across from Cost-U-Less, not too far from the Stadium.” That actually means something. If you want more detail, then it will be something like, “You know the left turn lane next to the gas station there? Well, he was turning there, but hit the sidewalk at the bus stop in front of the fruit stand. You know, the one with the large flag.”

I do know.

There are a few street names. I live on Lua St. in the government housing. Lua was a great Samoan chief who fought off cannibals from Vanuatu in the 1500’s. Just kidding, Lua is Samoan for ‘two’. I live on Second St.

I hear rumor they’re naming a few residential streets a couple of villages over from me, but that has yet to be confirmed.

The top posted speed on the island is 25 mph. Legally, nobody can go above 30 anywhere in American Samoa. While this cuts down on serious traffic accidents, it does significantly raise the level of exasperation. You know how annoying it is when somebody drives too slow? Imagine a two-lane road, where somebody decides that 10 mph is the appropriate speed for them.

The other interesting thing about driving here is that there are exactly zero (0) stop lights. None. Zip. Zilch. Nada. The only way to enter the highway is to wait for an opening, or wait for someone to wave you in. Either that, or you just pull into on-coming traffic and piss off everyone trying to drive safely.

Despite my seemingly negative view of the traffic, I don’t mind it too much. Mostly because when I drive to work, I’m going slow enough to enjoy the waves crashing ashore right next to the road. The smell of the beach and the sound of children getting ready for school really makes you think about…God dammit! Some jackass just cut me off.